They're Taking Over the World!!!!

Am I the only teenage girl in the world who doesn't like the Jonas Brothers? I may be the only sane teenager alive right now. This obsession with this awful trio of brothers has gone on long enough.

Generally speaking, I do not feel the need to criticize celebrities because they often receive too much criticism. But, I feel that the Jonas Brothers need to be taken down a peg or two. So, that feeling warrants this rant, I mean... post.

Let's start with their music. I would have more respect for the Jonas Brothers as artists if they would write deeper or more original lyrics. Love, lost love, heartbreak, and angst are the only topics their songs cover. Really, there is more to life than teenage love. I'm very sure of this fact. Could they write a song that might change the world? Or just not cause my ears to bleed? Please, I'm begging them.

There are two kinds of music: money making music (MMM) and world changing music (WCM). Guess which kind the Jonas Brothers are producing. If you chose the former, you guessed right. Sometimes, WCM and MMM are one and the same. Often, they are not. MMM is uninspired, and usually unintelligent. WCM lasts forever and makes a statement. WCM is rare. For example, Beethoven and other classical composers produced WCM. Johnny Cash's "Folsom Prison Blues" was pure genius. Bob Dylan's "Blowing in the Wind" was WCM. I'm not asking for the Jonas Brothers to try to live up to those musicians. I don't think they could do it, anyways. But, I am asking them to write something that might inspire their fans. In case they haven't realized it, they have influence over thousands of girls. Surely, they could use this power for the greater good. Disney didn't intend to change the music world, but they have. Screaming girls everywhere are demanding the Jonas Brothers' disgusting music, and they are getting exactly what they want.

For research purposes, I listened to "Burning Up", the smash hit by the Jonas Brothers. I wasn't impressed. From the first verse, I feel like this song has already been done before. And, it has. Teenage lust has been the muse of songwriters for years. But, most musicians have found a way to redo it and make it sound fresh. However, "Burning Up" sounds stale, and feels like old news.

Kudos to Disney for creating a band that is relatively safe for children to listen to. The Jonas Brothers' lyrics are one-dimensional, but clean. They may be using their good looks to sell their lackluster product. But, they are here to stay for a little while, at least. I guess I have to endure America's love affair with this bland boy band for some time to come.


Thanks for taking the time to read this rant. I made a conscious effort to be fair to the Jonas Brothers... Okay, I really didn't, but I feel better now. I'm not angry with them. I'm just sick of them.